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Writer's pictureGwen Henderson

NOT MY GIFT

NOT MY GIFT

 

I wrote these words in a blog entitled “Wishes” in December 2019. “Painting is not my gift, so the wish was never going to become reality.” They were penned in reference to my expressing a desire to paint the beautiful colors of sunrise. The Ponder This Thought statement for the same blog was, “Wishes can be a prelude to action.”  I share these two memories with you – one filled with hope, and one filled with pessimism – to illustrate the power of words and recording them.

 

My two adorable great-great nephews and their parents relocated to my city almost two years ago. Just before they arrived, I received a pinched nerve diagnosis, so pain had slowed me down and left me with a void that needed to be filled. As the youngsters and I sat at the kitchen table, them drawing and painting, I picked up a paper plate, looked at a banana and began to sketch the banana. The next day I finished the pencil sketch of a recognizable banana. Since then, I have filled a wall in my shed with charcoal, pencil, acrylic, watercolor, pastel, and oil paintings – some recognizable, some not so much.

 

Several things converged for the wish to become action, none of which I was aware of at the time. The presence of the boys sparked a childlike fearlessness in me to try to draw or paint without the adult voice in my head saying, “you can’t do this.” I had spoken (written) my wish to paint. I had issued a declaration about wishes, not realizing that I was speaking to myself. And slowing down created the space for me to look at something simple, filter the vision of the object through the brain and engage the hand to create a rendition of what the eye saw.

 

I don’t remember writing the words. When I look back through photos on my phone, obviously one of my favorite subjects is sunrise. Of course, my amateurish acrylics or pastels don’t do justice to the majesty of sunrise. They do represent the wish becoming true and validate suffering (slowing down) has a purpose.

 

So, what did I learn? Earnest desires can become true even when their probability is diminished. Ripening is a slow process, so don’t be afraid to slow down. There is always something else within to be explored. Look for it. And one of the guiding principles of my life has been proven once again … “The shortest pencil is better than the longest memory.” Had I not written the words, you wouldn’t be reading these.

 

 

PONDER THIS THOUGHT — A wish can be the prelude to action.



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